Seeing is believing

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I was recently featured on a blog. Avery M. Joule (“little_e” on AbsoluteWrite) began a project in which she’s posting interviews with non-published authors whom, she believes, are on the cusp of being published.  (If anyone is curious, the interview is  *here*  ). I don’t know how many folks actually read that little interview in which I talk about EFFIN’ ALBERT. Regardless, it was an honor to be asked.

But even as I wrote out the answers to her questions, I questioned my right to be doing so. Am I really on the cusp? Sometimes it’s hard to believe I’ll be published one day. But I do believe it’s going to happen for three writers: Guinea, Putputt, and mrs fringe.

I’m reading a manuscript right now, a YA fantasy. It’s bloody amazing, so richly constructed; so deliciously,  wonderfully rendered. I wrote about Guinea, the author, before. She’s agented now. It’s not a question of if she’ll be published, but when.

I’ve mentioned Putputt before, too. She’s flying high right now, having procured an agent and just finishing what hopefully are final edits to her wonderful novel. Putputt has been sharing her experiences relative to querying and working with agents on her blog, *here* . No doubt a publisher is going to snap up her novel. I can hardly wait. I’ve read it, I know how good it is.

I’ve been honored to read excerpts from a novel being written by mrs fringe, a friend of mine who lives in NYC. I’ve never met her in person. Doesn’t matter, she and I share the same wavelength, oscillate at the same frequency. She’s a wonderful writer (with an excellent blog, btw, you may find it *here* ). Her stories are richly woven, heart-breakingly honest; her characters, damaged but not totally broken–there’s a thread of hope tethering them to this imperfect world. This author’s work is thoughtful and compelling. She needs to be published: her desire and my observation.

Yeah, she’s that good. They all are. I believe in them, believe they’ll be published authors one day.

Then I look at my stuff. Look at EFFIN’ ALBERT which seems so . . .  sparse compared to the work of these writers. And even as I edit my latest, I wonder if I really have a shot or if I’m deluding myself. I’m (still) waiting for word from the literary agent who requested the full for CHERRY, still waiting to hear from the publisher who requested the same. Meanwhile, I’m revising ALBERT. Once in a while I allow myself to contemplate what if, but then I look at these other writers, the work they’ve done, and I can’t help but think I may not be good enough, my writing may not be solid enough, my stories may not be compelling enough to warrant representation or, dare I say it–

I guess we’ll see.

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13 thoughts on “Seeing is believing

    • Ahh, my heroine! One of three, the Prophesy of which is, you shall be published, kiddo.

      If I could look into your future, I know what I’d see. If I could look into mine. . . I’m not ready because I’m not sure what I’d see but I thank you for saying that, Guinea.

  1. Oh, my sweet kk. (((((((((Hugs))))))))
    First of all, Albert is effin awesome, because you are a fucking brilliant writer. Because in a few strokes you capture the heart of your characters, and then you squeeze, so your readers feel it and care. I don’t know what will be, but I know what would be if I were king, and I know what I believe should be. Your work should be published, and I believe you will be recognized and it will be.

    As for me, thank you. I say this calmly because I took the time to run in to Husband and squee, “Holy Fuck! You won’t believe what kk wrote!” I won’t lie, I hope your predictions come true (for all of us!). In the meantime, your faith, support, and friendship make all the difference every morning, as we “share” coffee and I open the file. xoxo

    • You are such a good writer, mrs fringe. I’m only saying what’s true. Don’t you forget it, not for a second.

      As for my writing, what can I say except thank you so, so much, mrs fringe. And I am amending this to add, to you, that I value your support, I trust you, I think you’re an amazing woman, strong and wise and so effin’ talented and I cherish your friendship.

      xoxo kk

  2. Uhh, you are batshit insane, woman. Whenever I read your books, I devolve into this weepy mess and whine, “WHY ARE SOME PEOPLE SO GODDAMN TALENTED AGSHGHAJGD.” and then Mike would go, “SIGH. You always get like this when you read kkbe’s books. Maybe you shouldn’t read her books anymore.” And then I’d go, “BUT THEY ARE SO GOOD GUHHHHH I DIIIIIE.” And then he ignores me while I alternate between reading your shit and rolling around the floor flapping and whining.

    Anywho, I have spoken with so many fellow AWers who agree with me that your writing is da shiznits. Slhuang, Buz, that stewpid snake…we’re all super rooting for you and we totally won’t be surprised when you make it. So dammit kk, stop this self-doubt right noaw! Your writing isn’t sparse, it’s powerful and effective and doesn’t sound like writing. It’s too easy to get lost in it, which is why I’ve always sucked at beta’ing for you. I’ve been hearing all this raving about ALBERT and I can’t wait to read it. So stop it! Stop beating yourself up! *smacks you about a bit*

    • Oh man, Putputt. Yeah, smack me around, I guess I need it. You have helped me immeasurably and I can’t thank you enough. And I thank you tonight for saying that stuff. You nut. I love you putster.

      -kk

    • Yup, I was just about to comment and say the same thing, only the hippo said it better n stuff. *g* I’m reading Albert right now (as you know, but Putputt might not 🙂 ), and holy crappola, what your brain puts out — it’s incredible, kk, what the eff.

      You clearly got no metric on your own talent, so let us set you straight. We know what’s what. 🙂

      • Yeah, da hippo definitely has a way with woids, don’t she, sl? 🙂

        sl, I do not know what the eff but I shall endeavor to heed what you’re saying, and I appreciate you saying it. Thank you so much, Lisa. Very grateful to you.

        xoxo kk

  3. I will read your interview when I am less blasted tired. I will say, though, “sparse” is not bad, if indeed your work is sparse. It worked for Hemingway, didn’t it? 😉

    I think it’s reasonable to doubt. It helps keep hopes low, and makes success (and even just praise) that much sweeter. But don’t undermine yourself. I haven’t read a lot of your stuff (I’m a woeful non participant with most things AW, which is a shame, because most people there are awesome and it is a great resource), but what I’ve read I’ve enjoyed, or I wouldn’t be here.

    I’m rootin’ for you!

    • Doubt has been an issue with me, it’s true. Maybe it does serve a purpose but you are so right, I can’t let it erode my confidence in my own writing. I have to champion my own stuff. All writers do.

      Today is a new day. I’m feeling different than I felt yesterday when I wrote that little blog–less uncertain, more humbled by the kindnesses shown. You are a sweetheart and I thank you so much, Jen Donohue.

      ❤ kk

      • Ooh, I’m a sweetheart. I need to print that out and cross stitch it! 😉

        But yes. We do need to champion our own stuff. Just the way it works, really. I’m glad you feel less uncertain (more certain? Confident? ^^)

  4. I don’t know what you mean by “sparse,” exactly.

    It’s true that Albert is a simple story of small dimensions. It is, plot-wise, quite straightforward, if that’s what you mean. There’s nothing grand and sweeping about it.

    But here’s the thing…

    Mike and Albert ARE mind-blowing just being themselves, and grand and sweeping aren’t always what scoop into you deep with a melon baller and pull your guts out.

    It takes no small amount of skill to take a simple thing and make it new and wrenching and chest-wringing and stab people with it. I can wave my hands and throw around a bunch of glitter and yell LOOK ALCHEMISTS AND EXPLOSIONS AND REBELLION AND PTEROSAUR POOP AND MURDEROUS DEER AND A DEAD WHALE and prance my silly prance, but there’s no way I could wring as much meaning and depth and perfection out of a single character the way you can. You take a simple thing and make it complex; you take that “sparse” thing and make me want to vomit from how nervous I am reading it. Simple and sparse, maybe, but so intimate I can’t not have profound feeling about it.

    So. Whatever about sparse. It’s just a damn good read.

    I have to say, though, that you’re kind of a gross suck-up in the beginning of that interview. Juuuust saayiiinn 😀 😀

    • Relative to your last comments: It’s the truth, buzzie. Every bit of it. What else can I say? 🙂

      As for the rest of it: Well, shit. That’s what I’m saying to you, buzhidao because you made my heart ache for a dumb little humiculus. One chapter, that’s all it took. So for you to write that stuff about ALBERT. . .

      Thank you, buz. What else can I say?

      xoxo kk

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